i guess that as i'm still a teenager, things like these matter.
it doesnt seem like it does, but it really hurts and behind my facade sometimes of just smiles, and laughter, lies so much of insecurity, i just wish i was someone else.what's the point in even hoping for anything at all when it's just going to be given to someone else, or taken by someone else. i feel so alone. in all honesty, no one could possibly understand what it's like. i have always been a good actress, all it takes is just to block it out of your mind, but all it takes is a moment when you just stone and then all the painful memories start flooding your head and the only thing you can do is smile because you don't want anyone to think something's wrong. but sometimes, its just plain tiring.why pretend to be strong when you feel like just falling apart.

on a brighter note, my IJ lovelies brightened my day today.went for council invest-congratz gen lissa ama and euge! :):):)
sooo happy to see all of them. and ama like started crying once she hugged me.shit i miss them so damn bloody much:( the X-es crack me up to no end.LOVE THEM FOREVER.i'm so grateful that i have such ahmazing friends.srzly.despite whatever, having an awesome family and kickass friends are the best things someone could ever have.
so yeah, anw back to EOM sigh screw you PW

xoxo

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MAO JESS COURT LIZZI CELLY JIA seven eight nine ten



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