This is Me
Marrissa.MARS
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LOVE GOD FAMILY FRIENDS
ADDICTED TO COFFEE AND MILK
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✏ title : This could be the start, of something new.
Posted on : Sunday, January 1, 2012 @ 9:15 AM
Happy New Year!
2012. I'M READY FOR YOU.
this past week has been crazy! but amazing nevertheless. went for multiple parties, met up with people i love and so on. it really was awesome. i've been going to the hospital with my grandparents to accompany them on their checkups and stuff. and even though on the day itself i usually feel tired and asking myself why in the world i volunteered to do this, seeing my grandparents and being able to take care of grandma during this rough time just makes me feel so content and satisfied. it's like i can look in the mirror and slowly like the person i'm becoming. grandma has done so much for me- to taking care of me when i was young, to giving me money every time i have an important function or when i go on holiday, to praying for me constantly and to sending me cards for most important occasions; even for my exams. honestly, its the least i could do. knowing that she appreciates my company takes the away the boredom of waiting in the hospital for hours, and i find myself trying to do everything to make her happy, to make her forget the pain. i want to be there for her in every way i can and maybe in doing that, i forget the pain. the pain of thinking about her suffering and just for a while, everything's alright.
apart from that, i've been thinking about 2011. and honestly, it wasn't the best year. i think a lot of people share my sentiments. but as i walked into Novena that day to put flowers (during the service, we forgot haha), i heard the priest say that instead of wishing for better things in 2012, we should be grateful for what we had in 2011 and pray that we will continue to be blessed. i am grateful. i'm so thankful for the family i have been immensely blessed with, the country i was born in, the friends i have come to know and love and my life as a whole. it's not perfect. just as daddy told me that day, i need to stop expecting and looking for perfection. I'm not going to get it. I just need to be happy. be happy with what i have and be happy for what may come my way. so for 2012, i place my life in God's hands. whatever is meant to be, will be. I just hope to have the courage. and to be.. bolder. to dare to take the risks, to dare to get what i want, and to dare to get hurt. because that's what i fear most i think. i immediately think firstly about my heart and trying all the ways i can to protect it. perhaps if you never give your heart away, then you can never really experience anything huh. ah well. i need to grow some balls ( not literally obviously)
I'm so ready for 2012. I'm going to have the time of my life!