I've said them.

Yesterday, in the park as we were sitting down on a bench and talking. My legs were on his and my head on his shoulder. Before that I had mentioned that I wanted to come up with a name to call him, and I wanted it to be different from what people usually call him. But, I forgot about it after a while and we began to talk about other stuff. And as we fell into a comfortable silence, he asked 'so have you decided?' and in that moment, my heart beat rapidly and my throat felt like constricting, but courage struggled to the surface and I whispered 'my love'. He still didn't get it. And was saying it would be weird to say that in school. I just shook my head and then out came the words.

I am still scared, don't get me wrong. In fact its terrifying. But there will come a point where the fear is bearable because there is something else far greater that you would be giving up if you give in to this fear. And it felt liberating, like FINALLY.

"& I won't hesitate, no more, no more
It cannot wait, I'm yours"